Technical University – Tbilisi, Georgia – 11:15pm

Day 3 of the Nanowrimo challenge, and I have successfully managed so far to write a minimum of 1, 667 words a day, despite feeling pretty unmotivated. I’m working on a werewolf fantasy romance adventure story, and I’m just not feeling it. It’s sad, because when I first wrote the outline a few months ago, I was so deeply invested in it. I remember just writing out the entire outline in one shot, working at it for hours, until I had surpassed 6000 words in planning. Yet, I only got as far as chapter 1 before setting it down for a few months. For this Nanowrimo series project, I decided to pick it up again and attempt finishing it as a four- or five-part series. I need to figure out a way to get back into this story, really immerse myself in my characters and their motivations, and the fun of world-building again.

I got a lot done in the day. I went for a massage and facial, and then headed to Lisi Lake for a mountain biking lesson, and then did a call with a friend in the UK to catch up. Sitting at the edge of Lisi Lake is always very soothing for the soul. The sky was overcast today, so it was the perfect weather for contemplation and reflection, and just trying to be present.

I ended up working at the McDonalds at Technical University for the rest of the night, doing a mix of ghostwriting and my own Nanowrimo writing. By 11:10pm, I managed to get 1704 words written towards chapter six of my werewolf novella. I never feel really satisfied with my writing nowadays though, and I think it’s because I’m writing more to fulfill a word count goal, which takes away from the intentionality of my writing. So, maybe the word count goals are actually counterproductive.

Still, I’m proud of myself for sticking to the challenge despite how easily it would have been to just miss a day. I was determined this time not to underwrite and leave myself to make up the missed words the next day, because that sort of habit is so quick to snowball into something hugely unmanageable. If I can stick to the goal and not burn myself out by over-writing, if I can pull from my hidden reserves of discipline and try to draw from motivational influences, I think I can get through this Nanowrimo challenge.

Whether I can actually come up with four or five finished novellas to self-publish by the end of the month is a whole other thing. That’s the thing I’ve been feeling bad about: I’ve done a lot of writing, sure, but have they actually been productive? Have I turned my writing into viable finished creations that I can market and sell?

Anyways, I’m tired. I’m going to head back and sleep, and then have fun tomorrow because I’ve got some music and dance classes on the schedule!

G’night world,

Alaska